The gift of gab

I am a talker.  I've been one most of my life. My mom likes to say that I was over 2 years old when I finally started talking and they haven't shut me up since!  I just talk a lot.  I can be quiet and I do have moments where I enjoy the silence but for the most part, I find quiet and silence awkward.  So often, when in crowds, I'll talk...to anyone...anyone sitting next to me, standing in front of me in the checkout line, someone walking down the sidewalk next to me.  I'll talk to anyone just to simply have a good conversation.  But here is why it is on my mind lately...
I've had a few people tell me how I talk so much.  It bothers them or they question why I can talk about anything to anyone.  And here is why I think that is.
First, I talk through situations and trials.  Not because talking about the problem solves the problem but simply b/c talking about the problem makes me feel better.  I feel better when I'm going through something to tell people about what I'm going through.  I'm not a "suffer in silence" type of girl.  Some people are and that's okay.  In fact, I have a few close friends that can go through SERIOUS trials in their lives and not tell a soul.  They might even consider me a dear friend but they aren't going to tell me that they have cancer until I pry it out of them (true story).  That's their perogative and I'm okay with that.  But for me,  I like to talk it out.  Lay out all my cards on the table.  If you ask me how I am, I'm going to tell you honestly--whether I'm good, bad, or ugly, I'll tell you.  And I think that's okay too.  It's what works for me.
Second, I find almost always that when I talk through something especially a trial or hardship, someone else appreciates hearing it.  So many times people will tell me "I'm glad you said something" or "I'm going through the same thing and haven't talked about it" or "I needed to hear that".  Misery does indeed love company.  Sometimes when you're crying and life sucks, it's so nice to have someone to commiserate with.  I know that sounds silly or wrong but it's true.  Sometimes when someone else's day stinks just as bad as my day stinks, I feel not quite so alone!  It's just true. So I like thinking that by talking things out, I'm helping or affecting other people.  My talking can be a gift.  It can help other people feel less inhibited in talking through things.
Lastly, this is who I am.  In the scriptures, there is a passage talking about the "tongue of angels", "the language of angels", and describing such as a gift.  I'm not saying I'm an angel.  Nor will I say that my incessant speech is any way a divine attribute.  But I do like to think that sometimes I'm inspired to talk to someone that needed to hear something.  Or maybe they just needed someone to talk to them, to acknowledge them...sometimes a stranger smiling at me and saying hello in WalMart makes my day!  Wouldn't it be amazing if you just made the checkout lady's day simply by saying "hello, how's your day going?  Is it busy today or are you getting a little break?" 
I'm not saying that all speech that comes out of my mouth is good.  And I know there are people out there that would prefer I keep my opinion to myself.  But this is on my mind today.  Yes, I talk alot.  Yes, most of my talk is fluff.  And frequently, most of my speech is grumpy and complaining.  But I think that there are people out there who need to talk.  They need to be heard.  One of my greatest fears in life is that I will leave this world and not be missed.  Truly!  I'm so scared that I will die and no one will come to my funeral.  So, if you're around when I die, come to my funeral, share stories of how I would never shut up and sometimes you wanted to slap me silly but remember that there were times when you needed to hear what I had to say.  If that happens, I think I'll probably be pretty satisfied that I had a good gift of gab.