Zeke's first year in pictures

is troublemaker my middle name?

So, last night at a ladies' activity at church, a friend of mine with a smile on her face and a cute little voice said that I was a troublemaker.  I've been thinking about it all day and I'd like to share my conclusion.  I do not believe myself to be a troublemaker.  I AM a mischief maker but I believe them to be two different things.  I've been known to play devil's advocate and I will talk in a circle like any good philosopher will but I don't like to start trouble.  I won't run away from a fight.  I'm not afraid of confrontation, esp. if I feel like I'm defending someone I care about.  But I do not actively seek out fights, arguments, or controversy.
I do enjoy teasing and sarcasm.  I am "snarky" when I feel defensive.  And I poke fun....at everyone...but mainly myself.  I'm so good at putting myself down that I probably don't give myself enough credit. 
With that being said, I find myself evaluating my behavior (and others' behavior as well) lately.  I started this goofy thing about the Elf on the Shelf.  A lot of friends have purchased these elf dolls and each night put together an elaborate scenario of "elf magic" that their children absolutely love.  They take pictures and post them on facebook.  I'm sure they are doing great family traditions that their kids will forever remember.  Every time I try to start a family tradition my kids usually complain until I give up.  These Elves are pretty creative and take a lot of effort.  I have no qualms with anyone who likes doing it.  It just happens that about 15 people I know do this tradition and so every day in the month of December, I see several posts of elves.  With that being said, last year I made a snarky remark about the posts...not about anyone in particular, just a comment about the tradition.  A friend made a comment about me posting about my  kids all the time in place of an elf.  I laughed it off and when she started her elf tradition this year, I gave her a hard time.  It then started a mischievous tradition that I just began called "Greta the Elf, too big for a Shelf".  Mainly my tradition takes me doing mundane activities with a goofy look on my face and taking a "selfie".  Then I post it to facebook and everyone laughs at me (and to be honest, I laugh at myself).  It's all in good fun.  But as I thought of my behavior this week, I hope that everyone else knows that it is in all good fun.  I don't want or mean to "start trouble".
Now, last night, a few other people made slight comments to me about my behavior.  I paused wondering if I'm being understood.  Perhaps I'm too jovial....or sarcastic....or maybe I'm just not sensitive to others.  This is a serious point for me b/c I have an issue with a few "friends" that I feel are not sensitive to others.  They routinely make comments to me that offend me, hurt my feelings, and sometimes downright honk. me. off!  I'm certain that they have no idea that they do it.  I'm certain that they don't mean to do it.  And I wonder if I brought it up to them how would they react?  Do I do the same to others?  Do I offend, hurt feelings or honk others off?  I don't mean to.  As I stated, I'm not a troublemaker.
I'm fiercely loyal...I will fight tooth and nail for my loved ones (family and friends included).  I will not back down from defending someone I care about and I've been known to fight for the honor of others (even when they don't necessarily want me to).  I won't run from a confrontation.  Sometimes confrontation can be a good thing and is necessary.  I truly believe that.  I honestly believe that sometimes things have to be fought over to be resolved.  With that being said, I'm not afraid of a fight (even ones where I know I may not win).
Still I find myself getting frustrated with some people who upset me, offend me, or just come off as "trouble" and I find myself being afraid that others see me as "trouble".  I don't want to be trouble.  I want to be funny, goofy, and lovable.  I hope that I can work harder at coming off as mischievous and not trouble.  But also that I can note when others don't mean to be trouble but are simply misunderstood.

A week of Busy-ness and a week of Blessings

So I knew that Thanksgiving week would be a busy one.  I planned for such event but in theory, everything seems so much more doable than it actually ends up being.  Kurtis and I decided when Zeke was born that even though Kalen and Zeke have birthdays two days apart, we would make sure that each boy had his own special day and that these days would not coincide with Thanksgiving.  We knew it would be busy and tough but when I feel determined about something, I really work hard to get it.
So we started our week off on Saturday actually by planning a Full Day Date for Mommy and Daddy.  Kurtis and I (along with another couple from church) left at 8am and drove 4.5 hrs to South Bend for the Notre Dame vs. BYU football game.  The temperature was a frosty 29 degrees with a windchill of 9 degrees.  Multiple layers, copious amounts of hot chocolate, and sheer determination helped us survive the freezing cold AND the snow.  Yes, we voluntarily sat out in freezing temps and snow for hours to watch a football game.  ND won 23-13 but it was a good game and I was so thankful to have Kurtis all to myself for one day.  We drove back home after the game, getting in a little after midnight!

Sunday we took the day to rest and plan ahead for the upcoming week.  Monday was a day to prepare for Tuesday which included two Thanksgiving Feasts--one for Izzy's first grade class and one at Kal's preschool.  Isabel dressed as an Indian princess and wore a tutu that I had made for her.  I made 5 lbs of mashed potatoes for the feast.  The hidden blessing was that the school cafeteria also made mashed potatoes and when there were leftovers, they simply dumped them in the nearest empty crockpot (which happened to be mine).  I came home from school with more mashed potatoes than what I sent to school that  morning.  I also had to make cupcakes for Kal's feast b/c we also celebrated his birthday at school.

On Wednesday, it was the 4th birthday of one Joseph Kalen Eber!  He was so excited all day to celebrate his birthday.  It was a construction vehicle theme.  I made the cake and he loved blowing out the candles.  He giggled his evil manical laugh the entire we were singing and the candles were on fire!  He thought that was pretty funny.  Pa even dressed as a construction worker to enjoy the event.  We also tried to take pictures of all the boys in the family and all the girls.

 On Thursday the madness continued as we gathered together again for Thanksgiving and Zeke's 1st birthday.  I hadn't seen my Grandma since Grandpa's funeral in April so I was very excited that she decided to come to Thanksgiving with the family.  It brings tears to my eyes to see everyone "gathered together".  Adding that to the celebration of Zeke's birth just one year ago made all the craziness worth it.  How blessed I am to have four beautiful, healthy children who wear me out, wear me down, and fill my heart with complete joy (and exasperation).  Zeke simple decorations were just 1st birthday themed but he seemed to enjoy the attention and toys!  We also got together for another momentous photo, one of all four generations of  Mays.

Today, as I type this, it is the actual day of Zeke's birthday.  I am sad b/c he is the last baby.  I'm sad b/c I won't have these moments again.  But I am so thankful for my beloved baby boy. His smile lights my day and his giggle warms my heart.  Zeke commemorated his birthday yesterday by climbing out of the crib for the first time and falling on his head.  His favorite person is my dad, Papaw!  He loves him and will leave anyone's arms for my dad.  He follows him around and reaches his arms up for Pa to hold him all the time.  He loves to say "Dadada!" and tries to lift his arm to wave "bye" but he doesn't wave it or anything.  He started walking at 10 months and have 8 teeth!
Tonight we will finish off our busy week with Thanksgiving dinner with Kurtis' side of the family.  We were also participating in Family Proclamation Week this week.  The first night we tried to make homemade ornaments and it was a disaster so I threw them out!  Monday night was Family Game night on the Wii.  Tuesday we went to tithing settlement at church and went to the pet store to buy things for our new fish!  Wednesday night was Kal's birthday party and we made construction paper turkey family by tracing our feet for the turkey body and our hands for the turkey feathers....we had everyone together so we actually made an extended turkey family!  It's so cute to see it on our wall!  Thursday night was Thanksgiving and Zeke's birthday party.  Friday we put up the Christmas decorations which is a tradition that I'm trying to start with the kids.  Tomorrow night will be making Ninjabread cookies and movie night to finish up our Family Proclamation week!  I'm so thankful for my family.  I don't always like everyone (or even myself) but I love them all!  I try to give of myself freely to my family (immediate and extended).  I am forever mindful of my blessings even when things are difficult.  I love my life!  I do complain and I do get overwhelmed and I am not always grateful BUT I would not give up the busy-ness or craziness for anything in the world!

Kalen-isms

Kalen climbed up on the couch next to me to watch his shows. I leaned over and very gently kissed him on the cheek. He replies "I love you too Mom!" I'm so happy that for all my faults, my kids know I love them b/c I show them, not in big or grand ways but in the little things. My sweet boy makes me happy.

Family Proclamation Week is upon us. Our church congregation takes the week of Thanksgiving and spends each evening focusing on the family. Some turn off TV, some cancel other activities that week. We just focus on spending some time with the family doing something fun. Tonight we made ornaments with our thumb prints to give to family. They did not turn out the way I hoped but we had fun.  I also asked the children one thing they were thankful for: Kalen: "I'm thankful for God, Jesus, Mamaw and Papaw AND Uncle Joe!!!!"  Isabel didn't want to answer and Sam said that since Izzy didn't answer, he didn't have to either.  We'll try again tomorrow!

that holiday between Halloween and Christmas

So I may say this every year but Thanksgiving really means something to me.  I can't tell you many memories of Thanksgiving as a kid.  I don't have any.  I just remember getting out of school, occasionally getting together with extended family and that's it.  We didn't watch football games or do crazy Thanksgiving traditions.  It was just that holiday between Halloween and Christmas.  I do remember that my mother refused to put up anything Christmas until after Thanksgiving Day so when I was in Jr. High and High School, it became a tradition to put up Christmas decorations the day after Thanksgiving Day (no Black Friday sales for us--I'm not even sure Black Friday was a big deal back then).  And really has an adult, the feeling hadn't changed much. Thanksgiving wasn't a big holiday.  I do remember our first Thanksgiving together, I was pregnant with Sam and we had the big dinner at our house.  I couldn't sleep and got up late to clean the kitchen.  At about 1 in the morning, I felt Sammy move inside my belly for the first time.  That was the only exciting Thanksgiving I could think of.....until four years ago.
Thanksgiving 2009 was the life changer.  We scheduled my cesarian section for 7am on the Friday after Thanksgiving.  I stuffed myself ridiculously b/c I knew I had an eight hour fast waiting for me that night.  We got up early to beat the Black Friday traffic to get to the hospital.  We didn't even know if the baby was boy or girl.  We already had one of each, why not be surprised?  And surprised we were when we got our brand new boy, Joseph Kalen Eber.  Fast forward three years, the Thursday after Thanksgiving...one whole week since the holiday and we found ourself again welcoming a brand new boy into our lives, Ezekiel Robert Eber.
This year we celebrate Kal's fourth birthday on Wednesday, Thanksgiving on Thursday, and Zeke's first birthday on Friday.  What a great way to remember that Thanksgiving is the holiday of Gratitude, Blessings, Family, and Love.  For all the chaos that next week will bring, for all the many pounds we will gain from feasting and birthday cakes, I'm so thankful for my family, my children, my two little guys.  I'm so blessed to have these special people in my life.  I'm so happy to have a family to love and care for. 
Yes, Thanksgiving is the holiday between Halloween and Christmas but it is so much more to me.  I have two little boys that bring LIFE to this holiday (no pun intended).  They make it meaningful, they make it blessed, they make it special!  And that makes me grateful!

Kalen figures out patterns

After watching an episode of Team Umizoomi today (it's a kids' show on Nickolodeon that focuses on math), he decided to play "pattern power".  He lined up his Hotwheels cars and then yelled at them if they weren't in the correct pattern--"woo-woo car, woo-woo car, car" NOT "woo-woo car, car, car, car".  It was very funny to listen to him straigten his toys out to the correct pattern.  But I suppose I should be happy that he is learning.
We also went to the Fairborn Police Dept yesterday.  Sam needed to go to earn his Wolf Badge and Uncle Joe met us on his day off.  As we were on our way there, I asked Kalen what he was excited about seeing at the Police Station.  He said the Ambulance.  I explained to him that the ambulances did not stay at the police station but the fire station.  As we were heading to the parking lot to see Uncle Joe's cruiser, we spotted two ambulances in the back of the parking lot.  Kalen turned around to me and said "I told you they would be here!"  It just so happened that one ambulance had broken down and they were switching the gear out into the other one.  Kalen was very satisfied that he knew more than me.

a stay at home mom

While waiting to pick Kal up from preschool, I began a conversation with a woman who was there to pick up her great grandson.  She watches both her great-grandson and his little sister so her granddaughter can work.  She makes the comment to me that she was a stay-at-home mother but watched her granddaughter while her daughter worked and now watches the great-grandchildren while her granddaughter works.  She proceeds to say "It is just too hard to live on one salary these days.  The woman has to work to afford anything."  I'm not a shy person when it comes to this topic and I didn't want to  come off as a fanatic.  I certainly feel that each person should make their own decision on whether or not to work or stay at home.  My sister proclaims that she could never be a stay at home b/c she would go nuts.  I simply replied "My husband and I made the decision before we got married that I would stay at home if we had kids.  It was a choice that was made early on.  My husband even went into work and asked for a raise b/c I was pregnant and we knew I would not work anymore.  He was able to get a raise and it takes work.  You give up things, fun things but you learn your priorities and I love being with my kids."
Though the conversation wasn't a long one and though it wasn't an indepth thing, it has been in my mind all day.  Especially when I get in the mail, the credit card bill that includes new van tires, a new timing belt for the car, and the new battery for the van.  Let's not forget some of our Christmas gifts for the kids....oh, and two little boys' birthday presents for the end of November.  NO!  Being an one-salary family is NOT easy.  No!  It is NOT something that anybody and everybody does.  And YES!  there are times that I worry or we tighten our belts or we go without things.  We are not rich financially!  We are not financially set for life!  We do not take family vacations every year or even every other year.  BUT we are rich!  We are blessed!  We are healthy!  We are family!  We are a couple that made a decision that was not easy then and is not easy now.  We stick by our standards, our faith, our hope, and our family.  So yes, I've thought alot about this today.  Yes, I'm a stay at home mom.  And NO!  I wouldn't have it any other way!